Cait Slade is a self-taught multi-discipline artist.
They were born, raised, and continue to persist in Illinois, USA.

 

I draw my inspiration from my experience of being, and the lifelong self-directed pursuit of knowledge. “Too sensitive to be alive”, “either easily distracted or hyper-focused” some people might say, but I see myself as being blessed with stubbornly optimistic gears of inquiry, persistently making connections and organically seeking illumination.

Collage in particular has provided me a way of expressing in an automatic but sacred fashion what might be impossible to convey with my haphazardly profound devotion. Since all art is up for interpretation, this is a huge relief to me — that another person could see what to me is an exorcism, and instead be amused or hopefully inspired. Collaging is my centrifugal force without a doubt, but my interests & ongoing projects include video art, dance, improvisation, poetry, songwriting / vocalizing, and storytelling.

Constantly craving the feeling of a "closed loop", resolution, my process is an intuitive improvisational event where something is made peace with or sense of, even if I sign/date the back and there are no answers after I file it away with the others. The quantity is either drowning me or it is a testament to me having been here. I take a jester approach to my work. I call myself an outsider because I gave up art school and struggle to keep up with my own visions, constantly revealing themselves dramatically whether I am ready to receive them or not. I’m an existentialist but these works are very dada & surreal in flavor, and that is intentional. My inability to articulate without thinking expansively makes it difficult to fully explain without you standing right in front of me… but undoing alienation from the self is the aim, and I dream of finding ways to share what I have discovered with others. Eventually I want to be starting conversations about ground-level community-oriented solutions to issues like the ones I have faced, which inarguably in and of themselves lead to experiences of social stigma, isolation, psychiatric exploitation and oppression.

Homeschooled in a conservative Evangelical Christian family for my entire primary & secondary education, I was a pretty lonely, anxious kid but I had this painful excitement about the world and its’ possibilities. I struggle with dishonesty (or something), so here goes this part. Since adolescence, much of my energy has been siphoned from me in a sanguinary war with anxiety & depression, and it has been difficult for me to believe in my ability to do the great things other people tell me they are certain I am capable of. This contributes to my sense of having become this sort of walking juxtaposition that I find heartbreakingly beautiful and maddening, but in good faith. Because when I take an honest look at my life, a misunderstanding of myself from the get-go coupled with this desire for a taste or knowing of such a variety is actually the source of my sadness &/or fear. Overwhelming yourself is a real thing, but generating more art is my joy, passion and pathway to expression. It keeps me alive and drives a high output of creative endeavors; I am only bored when I feel lonely, and I will never run out of ideas.

I believe that every day is an opportunity for us to cultivate our souls & intellects. I used to look at my life trajectory like it was a novel about this goofy, nihilistic person who won’t quit chasing what they can’t understand or keep up with. But I have overcome so many things that despite it all, I can no longer deny that in actuality I have always been dreaming and spotting new versions of or lanes for my aspirations. Studying psychology, fine art photography, sociology and library science, I completed 5½ years of higher education between a community college & state university but haven’t [yet] earned a degree. I would love to return to school at some point in the future if it’s in the cards for me, but for years I have felt burnt out academically, probably because I started “adulting” so early with so much pressure, real or perceived. Driven by curiosity and a hopelessly unbounding love for humanity in general… my favorite jobs have included bike messenger, thrift fashion retail associate, and broadcast media intelligence monitoring / video editing. I spent about the last seven years as a police & 911 dispatcher before taking a leave of absence for PTSD. Continuously exploring new art forms and committed to my belief that my story can help others, I am currently considering and consulting on what I would like to commit my working life to going forwards.

My imagination has always been my solace, and my piece of advice for you if you are still reading this, is to give yourself permission to explore yours.
Because it is crucial that we weave ourselves a net with which to catch us when there is no one else around; there is so much cacophonous distracting exterior sound (increasingly) in the metamodernity human beings have chosen to live in…
So let yourself listen to what you maybe haven’t been,
if nothing else seems to be working.